Fuck Yeah Ben Bernanke

evangelizing for ben

Carroll: I saw your Ben Bernanke
   post on Tumblr
11: 19 PM I have succumbed. He is pretty sexy in that "Die Hard" villain sort of way
 me: !!
   that makes me so happy
Carroll: I hope he does an interview with "Tiger Beat"
   Our young girls need new role models!
 me: YES
   tiger beat!
   he's so cute
   I want to marry a man pretty much just like him
 Carroll: He's our pin-up
   Helps out around the house
 me: oh yes
   takes out the trash!
Carroll: Yeah, Zack Morris would never do that

Improving on Ben the only way I know that’s actually possible: with puns.

That someone is me. <3 <3

Bernanke has tried harder than any previous Fed chairman to explain his actions to the public, holding town-hall meetings, writing Op-Eds, even granting a few interviews. He has testified before Congress 13 times this year, and unlike the intentionally incomprehensible Greenspan, he has tried to be clear.

“

—	Michael Grunwald, “Person of the Year,” Time Magazine, December 16, 2009

He is not, in other words, a typical Beltway power broker. He’s shy. He doesn’t do the D.C. dinner-party circuit; he prefers to eat at home with his wife, who still makes him do the dishes and take out the trash. Then they do crosswords or read. Because Ben Bernanke is a nerd.

He just happens to be the most powerful nerd on the planet.

“

—	Michael Grunwald, Time Magazine, “Person of the Year,” December 16, 2009

Okay, look. I know he’s a Republican, but even his friends didn’t know it! And he’s not very doctrinaire - he just likes the numbers.

Anyway, I sense a look of contempt in the corner of his eye. Greenspan’s look is priceless: “Oh brother.”

I heard a rumor that Bernanke voted for Kerry. I’d be surprised if he voted for McCain - can you imagine someone with Ben’s intellect and erudition trusting the economy to Sarah Palin?

Even when he was on the school board, he voted to raise taxes, despite not wanting to, because he knew it was the right thing to do.

Okay, whatever, I just think he’s cute. And maaaybe an exemplar of the perfect man for me.

I’d court Ben any day, especially since I know which team he plays for - the nice nerdy jewish girl team.

Make no mistake: He’s a baller.

When the economy is down in the dumps, Ben tries to retreat up in the air. Ben deals with a free fall in the economy by making free throws on the court.

I’d like to play a game of pickup with Chairman Bernanke.

Ben’s not all sweetness and light; he’s complicated too. I like that in a man - or mensch, as it were.